I’ve Done The Math – Now I’m Doing Something About It

IMG_1859 copyWhy would your Creative Greenius walk away from his high-paying, highly rewarding executive role at CBS EcoMedia where I was working to fund environmental, education, and wellness projects all across the USA, just as the company hit more  growth milestones and was likely to pay generous bonuses?

Biz card - Oct 18, 2013, 9-33 AMThe answer is simple and direct – because I have done The Math. 

And so it is that I resigned from my position as Director of Strategic Partnerships and Public Affairs for CBS EcoMedia effective  the first of this month and I will now be devoting my full time to working on climate change response with the South Bay 350 Climate Action Group, the South Bay Bicycle Coalition and 350.org

I had no other choice once I did The Math and saw what things add up to – and how little time we have left before the global temperature goes past the Game Over limit of 2°C.

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The Greenius Misplaces His Mojo… Momentarily

The entire 2nd half of 2010 found the Greenius in a Mystery Spot where the rules of nature no longer applied....

Wow, March First already.  Time do fly, don’t it?  It has definitely been been awhile, hasn’t it?  How you been?

Your beloved Greenius has been M.I.A. from this URL for all of 2011 – until now.  Maybe you noticed, maybe you didn’t.  Either way, I’m back and I’m returning with a new attitude, recharged energy and a fresh direction.  I can only imagine how thrilled you must be.

After playing a more subdued, measured and politically correct role locally for the past two years I am soooo over that.  I’m taking the gloves back off and cracking my knuckles.  Consider me now unshackled, uncensored and unafraid.  The perfect positioning for our What the Fuck? era.

I’d say “No More Mr. Nice Guy,” but hell I’m such an inherently nice guy at heart that no one would believe that… well, except maybe the gasholes who I’ll be metaphorically skewering like a razor sharp steel spike through a marinated lamb shish-kabob over burning hot coals.  Doesn’t that sound like fun?

I put up with a lot of crap last year and some of it shook me to my core. I’ll be the first to admit it, I lost my mojo as 2010 wore on and it wasn’t pretty.  Ennui and despair are a bitter and ugly cocktail to swallow, but that’s what was being served at the Green Bar for the last six months of 0h-ten and I drank enough to suffer a long hangover.

But I’m not hungover any more.  And I’ve not only got my mojo back, I’m ready to have me some laughs.  Seriously.

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It’s Time To Go To The Mattresses

godfatherSo let me get this straight – while those of us who are trying to lead greener lives, have been cutting our carbon footprints and working with our cities, states and the rest of the USA to help them do likewise, Killer Coal has been playing us for chumps and wiping out all our efforts every single second of every day.  Can you believe the nerve of those dirty backstabbers?  How long did they think we were gonna put up with that?

The Killer Coal Family is waging war against the rest of our families – and those gangsters will not stop until we take them down.  So as the head of the Galliani family I called a emergency meeting of the five families – who will all go nameless due to their fifth amendment privileges and a patriotic penchant for privacy. Therefore I’ll be speaking for the group.  Everyone thought that was a great idea, and I went along.  I know how to smell consensus when it occurs.

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At our meeting we all agreed that it’s time to go to the mattresses and declare war against coal until we kill them and put them out of business.  We had a vote and then we had a toast.  In fact we had several toasts.  Everybody felt very good about our decision.  We like it when we get to take on bullies.

We’re claiming self-defense since rubbing them out is the only way we can stop them from doing away with all of us. We already gave the Killer Coal Family a chance to stop disrespecting us and make things right – but what did those climate-changing con artists do instead?  They aimed more smokestacks at us and dumped toxic waste in our neighborhoods while they paid off the cops and the justice system to get away with it.  That just ain’t right.  And it ain’t a wise way to go when dealing with wise guys like us.

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So now we have no choice but war, and I say let’s do what we gotta do.  Hey, it’s not personal.  It’s strictly business.  And during economic downturns like this we take our business much more seriously.

But that doesn’t mean we can’t have lots  of fun and plenty of laughs the whole time we’re destroying their way of life, their business and their futures.  So leave the guns, and bring the canolli.  Continue reading

Ten Things President Obama Needs You To Know Right Now

chicagoskylineWhile the rest of America has been transfixed by the spiraling, ever-worsening economic crisis, the auto industry bailout and the Obama transition team leaks about Hillary Clinton and John McCain’s new roles in the Administration, I’ve been in Chicago engrossed in meetings with people I promised I’d never admit having met with.  So lets just say I went for the blues and the BBQ.

music_bluesAlong with the pulled pork I enjoyed finding out that these Chicago guys are smart enough to know what’s really going on out there and sharp enough to know they’ve got to get the rest of the country up to speed before January 20th rolls around.

It’s not like they gave me any secret briefing information or anything.  And it’s not like they told me what to write – not in so many words anyway.  But if you’d like to help the President hit the ground running – and be able to keep up with him along the way – here’s what you need to know. Continue reading

Shove That Coal Back In Its Hole – The Greenius Goes Solar

I’ve had it.  Your Creative Greenius has reached his tipping point.

The more I learn about the latest news on climate change and how much time we really have left to do anything about it, the more I feel like like the late Italian political theorist, Antonio Gramsci, who wrote in his Gramsci: Letters from Prison,

I’m a pessimist because of intelligence,but an optimist because of will.”

And it is that will that makes me declare that enough is enough, damn it.  New evidence is presented every single day of the weekit’s time to act decisively now.  But we are not living in sane times.  We are living in the Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs era. that would convince any sane person that

With greenhouse gases pouring into the skies and building up faster than the deficit with each passing day; with the price of coalelectric rates soaring up up up across the country; and with sell-out lizard brain politicians pimping oil as they croak out, “Drill here! Drill now!  Hell, drill my wife if it means I’ll get your vote!”; the Greenius is taking matters into his own hands and going solar.

I can’t wait any longer.  It’s either go solar, or go postal and believe me, nobody wants a Rambo Greenius.  I’m dangerous enough with a broom in my hands. Continue reading

Clean Coal, Healthy Cancer & Evil Jesus – Did I Mention Safe Green Nuclear?

In an attempt to locate “the good old days” I went back in the Creative Greenius time machine yesterday, but I could only afford enough gas to get us to January of 2008.  It seems like so long ago, doesn’t it?  We all looked so much younger then… when the Botox prices were still affordable.  Back in January, “the problems in Georgia” were still about Michael Vick and dog fighting; Hillary Clinton and John Edwards each still thought they’d be the next President; while John McCain was trying to decide between Polident or Fixodent.  I could wax nostalgic for January all post long… but I digress. Continue reading

Funniest. Candidate. Ever. McComedian In The House

If you know the Creative Greenius then you know how much I like to laugh and how I crave a clever comedy.

From The Daily Show to 30 Rock to The Simpsons to anything Albert or James L. Brooks do, I like me some laughs.  

In fact I need me some laughs – especially when so much of what I learn every day about climate change and how much worse it gets with each passing 24 hours adds up to us being as doomed as doomed can be.

But thank God for John Maverick McCain, who refuses to be worried about the serious facts and goes for the funny bone every chance he gets.

In a world of bad news and inconvenient truths the good old Straight Talk Express is still chugging along like a coal-fired comedy choo-choo making us all laugh out loud. Continue reading